Tera:
I don't know if you know this, but we have history, you and I. See, beginning in 2006 or 2007 I started following you through The Raw Divas. Your vibrancy for life, feistiness, and wild red hair — like mine — pulled me in! I followed you through Health in High Heels, Green Smoothie Challenges, and more monomeals than I can count. I signed up the Raw Diva courses with Dr. T and Dr. Ritamarie. I signed up for each of these programs with the belief and intention that IT would be the program to change my life. All I needed was just more knowledge and surely I'd make the right decisions, right?
You probably see where this is going, but I couldn't have been more wrong. Turns out that the PROGRAMS wouldn't change my life, I would, and I wasn't ready in 2006, or 2007, or 2009 so I quit program, after program, after program. Filled with all the knowledge I needed, I found myself more overweight than when I started and totally frustrated with green smoothies and online courses, and though it pains me to say it now, with you.
So I broke it off.
I took my name off the mailing lists. I deleted anything that came my way that hinted at green juicing or detoxes. My bitterness festered and though I knew it wasn't you, it was ME — it was ALWAYS me — it was so painful to see your cheerful face and wild hair in my Inbox taunting me with the life I COULD have if only I could get my $%(& together.
Fast forward to one day about 8 weeks ago. For some reason I thought of you — not a program, but you — and decided to Google you and see what you were up to these days. Somehow I found an invitation to the Virtual Lifestyle Design Retreat. And something tugged at the deepest part of me.
I filled out the application, mostly because I wanted to know if I'd be accepted… I was scared when I found out the next step was a call with a real live person to TALK to me about my journey. I reluctantly set up a call with Alison through Skype. I didn't let her see my face – turned off the video… And I was skeptical as skeptical could be until two words — Be Cause.
What the hell? I thought. Is that even an option? To live life as cause instead of a perpetual state of reacting to what's thrown your way? With those two words I decided I'd sign up. And I did.
I must say at first I was skeptical. Would this program be any different?
Looking back now, I can say it has been. First of all, the Virtual Lifestyle Design Retreat is different because it is not just a program to buy off the shelf, but includes a FANTASTIC Facebook support community (and this coming from a self-proclaimed social media hater who had to create a new Facebook account to join the group), and attention and feedback from you and your coaching team. I knew from the start that this wouldn't just be me trying to work through a program, but that I had the full support and encouragement of you, and beautiful, strong women from around the world – women I now consider good friends though we've never "met."
This support is what got me through my initial misgivings and fears, and it's what has kept me going through the program when I've hit hiccups. But most of all, the Virtual Lifestyle Design Retreat is different because the focus isn't on green smoothies or detoxes or any type of restriction or "no" — it is about connecting to self and saying "yes." Yes to dreams and purpose. Yes to an ideal life. Yes to confronting obstacles head on to be able to overcome them. Yes to facing the truth about past actions and how they've impacted the present. Yes to personal integrity.
Yes to freedom.
During the past seven weeks, my life circumstances have not been awesome. Our only car was totaled, we've had a crazy amount of conflict with some of our friends and neighbors, financial issues persist, and I had a pregnancy loss of two much-longed-for babies.
And yet. . .
I am great.
In fact, I'm more than great. I'm looking people in the eye when I pass them in stores or in the hallway of my foster son's school. I'm smiling and talking to them. I'm seeing who they are without worrying about if they are judging me. I'm crazy-in-love with my neighbors newborn baby. I'm cuddling with my foster kids and being the tickle monster. I'm taking responsibility when I screw up. I'm not reacting in difficult meetings, but maintaining my personal integrity and focusing on observing and communicating truth instead of being right. I'm finding the courage to communicate honestly from the core of who I am. I'm making jokes. I'm laughing. I'm kissing my partner more. I'm not feeling like I need to hide. I feel alive.
I feel like I'm not in a chronic mode of reaction, but that I am, for the first time I can remember, poised to be cause. This program has changed my life because it was a safe place to get me ready to change my life. Thank you for this opportunity. The course isn't finished and I'm looking forward to the final week and to continued relationships with my newfound, deep friends. And I'm already recommending it for others I know.
Much love,
Angela Adams